Be Smart; Spend Money On Ski Clothing Rather Than Actual Skiing Gear
It’s a continual mystery why people fall in love with skiing. After all, it’s nothing more than trying to get down Mount Everest on a couple of wooden boards that usually direct one right into the tree line at about Mach 3. However, at least the clothing can help one look good while crashing. So be smart; spend money on ski clothing rather than actual skiing gear.
Consider that Alpine skiing equipment probably costs hundreds and even thousands of dollars today. Consider, also, that most ski resorts rent the stuff, and for prices that are at least cheaper than the 18 weeks of hospital stay that usually ensue when Alpine skiing isn’t done properly on the part of somebody who thinks they actually know how to ski without the benefit of lessons.
That’s why spending the money for the rental gear and then spending the real money on the clothing that can help one look like an Olympic gold medal-winning downhill skier is probably the smarter move. Don’t worry about being laughed at while skiing all day on the bunny slope, because those peasants don’t get that their lives are in danger every second they’re on a hill higher than 2 feet.
And the first thing that a little money should be spent on is a nice black sport watch. This handy little instrument can tell all kinds of time, especially the time when the clubhouse’s happy hour is set to kick off. It’s certainly worth the equivalent of receiving endless huzzahs for having skied the tallest slope, though that was an accident that took place after having gotten on the wrong lift.
And maybe that’s why it’s a good idea to buy a nice black helmet. After all, it’ll hide all of the blood stains and even the gashes that it took on behalf of that egg-soft skull that it’s protecting and that can’t seem to conceive that mountains aren’t meant to fall down from. At any rate, one will look good while the ski patrol gets the medevac helicopter to take one down from the mountain top, right?
There’s really no deep secret to skiing as long as one understands that it’s a sport designed to get a human as close as possible to the speed of light while wearing funny looking footboards designed to not handle icy, frozen white water crystals very well. The sport certainly seems to have been designed by some cruel god more interested in torturing the little humans through skiing than anything else, sad to say.
It’s probably smart to just go out, spend money on some seriously good-looking ski clothing and save the money that skiing equipment would cost and apply it to a nice life insurance policy. The rental stuff looks just as good outside the ski clubhouse, while the renter of it is inside, enjoying happy hour and looking really good in all his finery. Really; who wants to ski anyway?
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Tags: skiing hazards, skiing safely